Guest Blog by Anna Robinett (The Closet Lady)
I’m Anna, and this is my experience with breast implant illness and explanting to go flat.
I first had saline breast implants placed in 1994. At the time, I had a five-year-old daughter and hadn’t planned on having any more children. But life had other plans. By 1997, I found myself in a new relationship and pregnant with my youngest daughter.
After giving birth and nursing her with implants, I replaced the original saline ones with new implants in 1998. I believed I was making the best decision for my body and my life. What I didn’t realize was that choice would haunt my health — and my daughter’s — for decades.
When Mother’s Instincts Begin to Stir
Over the years, my youngest daughter developed unusual and complex health issues. Eventually, she was diagnosed with Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, a genetic connective tissue disorder. As I watched her symptoms unfold, a troubling thought took root: What if nursing her with implants exposed her to toxins?
I now firmly believe that her health issues were exacerbated — if not triggered — by my breast implants. It’s a heavy realization that I wouldn’t wish on any mother. In hindsight, I would never have chosen to put implants in my body, let alone nurse a child with them.
A Slow Decline and the Search for Answers
While my daughter struggled, I was fighting my own invisible battle. Over the years, I developed chronic and undiagnosed illnesses. Despite living a clean and healthy lifestyle, I felt like I was falling apart — physically and mentally. Symptoms shifted constantly, leaving doctors baffled. Many suggested it was “all in my head.” I began to believe them.
That changed in October 2018, when I was diagnosed with invasive lobular breast cancer — Stage II, with spread to my lymph nodes.
The Cancer Diagnosis That Changed Everything
Ironically, I only found the lump because I heard Christina Applegate share her story on Oprah. Inspired, I performed a self-exam and discovered a lump in my armpit. My mammogram showed nothing. It turns out that lobular breast cancer often doesn’t show up on mammograms — a chilling fact I learned the hard way. An ultrasound confirmed the diagnosis.
I was 28 years into life with implants, and my body had been accumulating toxins all that time. I began to wonder if the implants hadn’t just made me sick, but perhaps had even contributed to the cancer.
I was newly married. My youngest daughter was just nine. And I was about to navigate a terrifying cancer journey completely alone. I had no family support, and my new husband offered no compassion. But I had my daughter, and a fierce will to survive for her.
Choosing a Double Mastectomy — and Choosing Myself
My doctors recommended a lumpectomy or single mastectomy followed by chemo and radiation. But I wasn’t comfortable with that. I had learned that lobular cancer can mirror itself in the opposite breast. I chose a double mastectomy, despite opposition.
I also declined chemotherapy and radiation, due to my history of extreme allergic reactions. Instead, I was prescribed Letrozole, an estrogen-blocking drug, for 10 years. It wasn’t a decision I took lightly, but it was mine.
Emotionally, the double mastectomy was brutal. I grieved the loss of the breasts that had nursed my children — the parts of me that had nurtured life. On top of that, my spouse made it clear that my physical appearance mattered more than my health. I didn’t feel truly loved. I didn’t feel safe making decisions for me.
A Decade of Pain, 16 Surgeries, and the Breaking Point
I wasn’t given any option other than breast mound reconstruction. I went through 16 surgeries to place tissue expanders. My chest tissue began to die. Wounds wouldn’t close. The process was excruciating, emotionally and physically.
Still, no one ever suggested removing the expanders and stopping reconstruction. I was simply told: this is the way it’s done.
Eventually, I had implants placed again. I was reassured they were “safe.” But I continued to suffer with breast implant illness. I had capsular contracture, autoimmune issues, and constant pain. I looked “healthy” — but only in clothes. Inside, breast implant illness made me feel like I was 108 years old.
I changed my diet and lifestyle, and switched to 100% organic products and clean living. It helped, but the pain and illness remained.
The Explant Decision That Saved My Life
Ten years after getting implants, and experiencing breast implant illness, I made the hardest — and best — decision of my life. I chose to explant and go flat.
This was not a celebrated decision. It was met with skepticism and medical pushback. I had to fight for the right to remove foreign objects from my body. I was even subjected to a mental health evaluation, as if there was something psychologically wrong with wanting to be free of implants.
At the time, flat closure wasn’t a thing. I couldn’t find support groups or even resources online. But I knew what I needed.
I found a surgeon who agreed to remove the implants and perform a flat closure. He later confirmed what I’d feared: I had breast implant illness, and my years of surgeries had done serious damage. He’d never seen such destruction. I had so little muscle left that even arm movement had become restricted.
Healing from Breast Implant Illness — In Body and Soul
When I woke up from explant surgery, still groggy from anesthesia, I knew I was healing. I felt better immediately. My arms moved more freely. My eyes were clearer. My pain was easing.
Finally, my body was free from breast implant illness.
A few months later, I found online groups for breast implant illness and flat closure. The support was life-changing. I wasn’t alone anymore.
Today, I’m known as The Closet Lady, advocating for flat fashion and body autonomy. I’ve never felt more feminine, more myself, or more powerful. Who would’ve known?
Redefining Femininity — For Me, and My Daughters
Perhaps the most rewarding part of this journey is how my daughters have watched me redefine femininity on my terms. They know now that being a woman isn’t about having breasts — it’s about being whole, authentic, and strong.
I want every woman to know: You are beautiful and valuable, with or without breasts. You deserve agency. You deserve answers. You deserve a life free from chronic pain and hidden illness.
If you’re experiencing breast implant illness, or on a journey from implants to explant or curious about going flat after breast cancer, know that you’re not alone. There’s a community waiting for you — and freedom on the other side.
About Anna Robinett
I’m a long-term lobular breast cancer survivor, 17 years(!) thriving after overcoming breast implant illness and autoimmune challenges. Removing my implants was a turning point—choosing to remain flat despite societal pressures about beauty, femininity, and aging. Now, at 61, I celebrate my body and life without limits, embracing creative self-expression every day.
My platform is about painting your body as a canvas—dressing in what makes you feel fabulous, regardless of age, shape, or trends. I thrift 90% of my wardrobe, championing sustainable fashion and the power of reusing and recycling. Living with chronic conditions, I focus on a healthy, autoimmune-friendly lifestyle to feel my best.
Here, you’ll find inspiration to break free from expectations, wear what you love, and own your confidence—because relevance, beauty, and sensuality have no expiration date or required shape. Join me in redefining what it means to be vibrant, visible, and unapologetically yourself at any age.
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